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Thursday, October 31, 2013

Have A Safe And Happy Halloween 2013 From Movies At Dog Farm!


jack-o-lanterns 2013 photo by adrienne cupp
Adrienne's jack-o-lantern and mine, carved 10/30/13.  Photo by Adrienne Cupp



Posted by Brandon Early

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Movies At Dog Farm Presents The Diary Of A Movie Watchin' Madman

The Conjuring (2013) poster
     Here, at last, is my final dispatch for this year's Pre'Ween celebration.  I've long been in the habit of attempting to watch thirty-one movies in thirty-one days each October,  and though I failed this year, here's an annotated list of what I did watch.  Since I have such an aversion to writing proper movie reviews, you just may see this format of capsulized impressions again in the future.  It seems a good way to document my viewing habits without getting all hypercritical about it.  For what it's worth, I expect to watch both The Conjuring (2013) and Trick 'r Treat (2007) by Halloween night, as well.


     Happy Pre'Ween, everyone!  Have a safe and satisfying Halloween!
____________________________________________________________________________

(10/1)  She (1965) - I've still got nothing but love for you, Peter Cushing, but She put me to sleep.  Yes, literally.  (First Watch)

(10/2) Sharknado (2013) - A shitstorm of dodgy CGI and groan inducing stupidity . . . Sharknado was every bit as cheerfully retarded as I'd hoped.  What were the odds that Ian Ziering would be swallowed whole in midair by the "right" shark in a sharknado full of 'em?  It's brain dead entertainment at its finest. (First Watch)

Bloody Moon (1981) decapitation
Bloody Moon (1981)
(10/2)  Bloody Moon (1981) - Best circular saw decapitation ever, followed quickly by a gratuitous child murder - just because.  Throw in some sleazy incestuous plot points and horrendous dubbing, and you've got yourself a modest winner.  (First Watch)

(10/6)  Rewind This! (2013) - Sure, this documentary about the rise and fall and rise again of the humble VHS tape isn't actually a genre movie, but how many of us saw our favorite genre movies for the first time by way of a grotty old rental VHS tape?  Great doc, and as an inveterate collector myself, I found it deeply inspiring.  Recommended.  (First Watch)

burnt Chucky from Child's Play (1988)
Child's Play (1988)
(10/8)  Child's Play (1988) - Why does Child's Play director Tom Holland not get more love from the genre community?  Seriously, check out Holland on IMDB - in both his directorial and screenwriting capacity.  I finally got to watch a lovely Blu Ray edition of this tonight, and I was reminded once again what an effective little piece of nonsense Child's Play is.  I hear the just released new Chucky movie goes back to basics and shoots for a similar, less comedic vibe, and I plan on watching that before the end of the month, too.  (Re-watch)

(10/9)  Pacific Rim (2013) -  How could my first viewing of a movie I'd been anticipating for so long turn into such a complete freakin' disaster?  Sadly, Pacific Rim was marred for me by a malfunctioning Blu-ray player that guaranteed I never watched more than about a ten minute stretch without having to reboot my media server.  I ultimately ended up having to watch the big conclusion on my laptop.  Grrrr.  Those ten minute clips were good, though.  I'll definitely have to give this one another shot under better circumstances.  (First Watch)

American Horror Story: Coven poster(10/10)  American Horror Story: Coven (2013) - Yeah, I'm counting this.  It's my sexy blog, I do what I want!  The first episode of American Horror Story: Coven was easily one of the best "horror movies" I've seen lately.  Though I thoroughly enjoyed the first two seasons, this slick and focused premiere seems to promise - at last - a slightly less grim and oppressive tone.  There's still plenty of sex, violence, and mayhem, but the principals (Jessica Lange, Kathy Bates, Sarah Paulson, Taissa Farmiga, et al.) are clearly having more campy fun with things this season.  (First Watch)

(10/12)  The House On Sorority Row (1983) - Who knows why, but Adrienne requested a slasher movie tonight.  Fortunately, I had a plenty of them on hand owing to this older post in which I prattled on about how I was going to start watching more golden era slasher movies.  This would be . . . let's see . . . the first slasher movie I've watched since writing that post.  The House On Sorority Row was more professionally crafted and slick than most of its ilk, but it otherwise brings little to the slasher party.  I felt for much of the film's run time - while the sorority sisters were struggling to conceal and / or dispose of Mrs. Slater's body - as though I was watching a teen comedy from the same era a la Weekend At Bernie's (1989).  You won't hear me say this often, but I actually think the remake Sorority Row (2009) was far more entertaining.  (First Watch)

(10/16)  One Million Years B.C. (1966)  . . . has a great poster.  Only the typically fine stop motion animation of the late Ray Harryhausen succeeds in breaking the tedium otherwise.  All these great Hammer movies to choose from.  What was I thinking? 

Friday the 13th The Final Chapter Jason's demise
Friday The 13th: The Final Chapter (1984)
(10/17)  Friday The 13th: The Final Chapter (1984) - This is the slasher movie Adrienne actually wanted to watch on the 12th, and she only slept through half of this one.  It's a personal fave (though it still doesn't top Part II), and I watched with renewed interest this time owing to a nifty little documentary that I'll mention here when I finally finish watching all seven plus hours of it.

(10/22)  Pacific Rim (2013) - Take two, and Adrienne watched it with me this time.  Much better experience on the second go round, but I was afforded the opportunity to note what a charisma free block of wood Charlie Hunnam is.  Also, one of the coolest things about giant monsters versus giant robots is a well delineated sense of scale in the action sequences.  Setting the entire end of the movie underwater with no reference points for scale (buildings, vehicles, boats, etc.) robbed the finale of some of its impact.  Still, those monsters and robots were pretty sweet.  By the way, if anyone can explain to me what might makes a Jaeger "analog" as opposed to "digital", I'd love to know.  Would anyone ever actually make an analog robot?  Could you?  I need an answer from a robotics engineer, like, right now.  (Re-watch)

(10/23)  Crystal Lake Memories: The Complete History Of Friday The 13th (2013) -  It is, indeed, complete.  It's so complete I could literally have watched four or five other complete movies in the time it took me to watch this one documentary.  I regret nothing.  It's pretty tough to dig up fresh and compelling info on a franchise that's nearly thirty-five years old, and Crystal Lake Memories does so.  (First Watch)

An American Werewolf In London
An American Werewolf In London (1981)
(10/25)  An American Werewolf In London (1981) -  As I edge ever closer to the Big Day, I've come to realize I'm not going to watch anywhere near my typical thirty-one movies in thirty-one days this Pre'Ween.  I'll have to go for quality over quantity.  Adrienne recently reminded me that I'd yet to show her this one in its entirety, and this is about as good as a genre movie gets.  She was watching a show on Hulu titled Call The Midwife in which the name Jenny Agutter (Nurse Alex Price in AWIL) appeared in the credits, and I made a remark about how foxy Agutter had been in AWILWhat does the fox say?  Anyway, Adrienne fell asleep before David's first transformation, so I suppose she still hasn't really seen An American Werewolf In London in its entirety.  That just gives me an excuse to watch it again at some as yet unscheduled date in the future.  Adrienne did at least recognize a snippet of dialog from the movie that I'd used in my Halloween Monster Mix before she fell asleep, so there's that . . .  (Re-watch)

Room 237 poster(10/27)  Room 237 (2013) - Erin at Deep Red Rum (which is transforming into Seven Doors Of Cinema on November 1st) already made far more cogent observations about this documentary than I could ever muster, and I believe reading Erin's post put me in the proper frame of mind to enjoy Room 237 as an entertainment - and only an entertainment.  Arguably, Room 237 is a documentary about various theories that have evolved over the years as to what Stanley Kubrick's The Shining (1980) is really about.  I say arguably because, as Erin pointed out in her post, it seems by the sloppy nature of its construction and attribution (or lack thereof) that this documentary is actually about something other than what it's actually about.  Just like The Shining, right?  Now my head hurts.  Taken purely at face value, though, I enjoyed Room 237.  Again . . .  just like The Shining, right?  The snake continues to eat its own tail.  I'm glad Erin already did the hard thinkin' on this one.  Movies like this are precisely why I rarely ever write a proper review.  (First Watch)

Clancy Brown, just being badass in Hellbenders (2012)
(10/27)  Hellbenders (2012) - A writer / director with a slightly more mainstream sensibility than J.T. Petty could have really made hay with the notion of blasphemous hellbound ministers dragging demons back to Hell.  As it is, this is the fourth time - following Mimic: Sentinel (2003), S&man (2006), and The Burrowers (2008) - that I've seen Petty not quite deliver on the promise of  his own great ideas.  I'll give him the benefit of the doubt on this round, though, and say that I suspect most of Hellbenders shortcomings can be place squarely at the feet of an insufficient budget.  You just can't promise Hell on Earth throughout and then end the movie with a brawl in the middle of a field dotted with CGI fire pits.  Still, Hellbenders does have much to recommend it.  A fresh idea, a bawdy sense of humor, and a uniformly excellent cast all make it worth at least a rental.  In particular, the always fantastic Clancy Brown absolutely owns it as Angus, the group's foul mouthed and surly senior member.  Petty should make damn sure Brown is along for the ride if we get a Hellbenders II.  (First Watch)

Curse Of Chucky (2013)
Chucky brings the scary back!  Curse Of Chucky (2013)
(10/28)  Curse Of Chucky (2013) - It's fortunate that I happened to watch the original Child's Play (1988) again recently, because Curse Of Chucky is the only other film in the franchise that truly feels like a continuation of the original's narrative and tone.  The first and second sequels were both underwhelming and forgettable.  Bride Of Chucky (1998) worked brilliantly as a parodic reanimation of a moribund franchise, but there were no scares to be had.  Seed Of Chucky (2004) took that evolution a step further and was almost purely comedic.  Who would have thought the sixth in the series would so successfully return the franchise to its scary roots while retaining just enough of the winking self-awareness of Bride and Seed to make the whole affair a bit more than just a competent killer doll movie?  I sure didn't.  Curse Of Chucky undoubtedly benefited from my diminished expectations, so I wouldn't want to oversell it - hyperbole is almost always suspect - but Curse just may be the best of the franchise.  The bulk of the movie is better than you'll expect it to be, but it's the last twenty minutes or so that really swing for the fences.  Curse Of Chucky does a commendable job of bringing the franchise full circle.  This is a rare instance where a franchise entry actually feels like a worthy conclusion to a twenty-five year old series.  Perversely, that almost guarantees we'll see more entriesBe sure to stick around through the end credits for a genuinely funny, unexpected, and appropriate coda.  (First Watch)
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     So long for now, dear diary.  I'll be watching you . . .









Posted by Brandon Early

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Getting Back My Halloween Mojo (And You Can, Too!)

Sam from Trick 'r Treat (2007)
Sam, just keepin' it real . . . Trick 'r Treat (2007)
     Halloween is my favorite holiday.  Shocker, right?  Most people take a week off to go to the beach each year.  I take a week off at the end of October to celebrate Halloween.  Lately, though, I've found myself ringing out the month of October feeling a little depressed.  My Pre'Ween activities leading up to the holiday proper have consumed more and more of my focus for the last several years, leaving Halloween itself seeming more than just a little bit anticlimactic.  This troubles me.

     Upon reflection, I've realized my Halloween ennui (read that three times quickly) stems not from within, but from a rising ambivalence toward the holiday perpetuated by the world around me.  No one seems to celebrate Halloween night correctly anymore.  My Octobers had always been filled with movie marathons, Halloween themed projects, and seasonal treats.  That was always capped off by a quiet evening at home basking in the soft glow of the jack-o-lanterns, enjoying a few five star horror movies, and answering the door when the trick-or-treaters came calling.  Where did all the trick-or-treaters go?

     That last one was the key component, I think, but now I'm lucky to get three or four trick-or-treaters a year.  How the hell am I supposed to maintain my child like sense of wonder about Halloween when the children can't?  I don't blame the kids, though.  It's the parents who've let the holiday go to shit.  I'm looking at you, Mom and Dad.  Halloween doesn't just happen.  We all need to step up our games (I'm including myself here) and do our parts to get set things right.  Trunk-or-Treat in a parking lot isn't good enough.  I want my baby Gunnar growing up with the same kick ass version of Halloween I knew.

     I've worked up a plan of action, and if we all do our parts we can bring back Halloween from the edge of oblivion.  Following are seven steps we can all take to keep Halloween from becoming irrelevant.  Do it for the kids - and if I happen to get back my Halloween mojo in the process, so much the better. 


Step 1 - Take Your Kids Door To Door 
     Trunk-or-Treat doesn't cut it.  Seriously, who decided letting children wander around parking lots digging in people's trunks for candy was somehow less dangerous than going door to door in your own neighborhood?  Find out where all the neighborhood pervs live beforehand, and plan a proper trick-or-treating route accordingly.  You'll be right there with the kids, right?  Of course you will.


Step 2 - Don't Micro Manage Your Kids' Choice Of Halloween Costume       
     Try not to let your unfulfilled childhood desire to be a pretty ballerina make your darling little boy a laughingstock.  Kids loooove the autonomy of choosing their own costumes.  What was your favorite costume as a child?  Bet your Mom didn't pick it out for you.


Step 3 - Celebrate Halloween On October 31st 
     No one reschedules Christmas when it inconveniently falls on a Sunday.  Halloween is October 31st.  Period.


Step 4 - Don't Make Halloween Into Something That Sucks
     "Harvest Festivals" suckDon't make Halloween into a "Harvest Festival".
 

Step 5 - If You Don't Have Kids, Have Proper Treats On Hand, And Don't Be That Dick Who Turns Off Your Porch Light              
     The dicks know who they are.  They're begging for tricks, so be sure to seize the opportunity to teach the young'uns about karma. 


Step 6 - Actually Carve A Jack-O-Lantern 
     Don't paint a goofy face on your pumpkin.  Don't glue parts onto your pumpkin a la Mr. Potatohead.  Get on up in those pumpkin guts and do it right!


Step 7 - Let The Kids Watch At Least One Wildly Inappropriate Horror Movie That's Sure To Give Them Nightmares
     It's a rite of passage.  Sure, the kids might wake up screaming from the night terrors afterwards, but after that it'll turn into a cherished memory.  

 
Trick or treat jack-o-lantern     You get the idea, folks.  We can do this!  If you think I've missed anything, let me know by leaving a comment below.  You've still got plenty of time to get your own plan of action in place before the big night!





     Happy Halloween again!




Movies At Dog Farm Pre'Ween 2013 logo




Posted by Brandon Early

Friday, October 18, 2013

A Movies At Dog Farm Guest Post: ZombieBert's Top 5 Rules For Surviving The Zombie Apocalypse

Zombie rising from the grave by Brandon Early
Zombie Rising From The Grave - illustration by Brandon Early

      Ok, so you wake up one morning and look out the window.  WHAT'S THIS!?!?  Crowds of infected, festering, reeking, used-to-be-humans are walking the streets!  Let's get one thing straight... if you aren't prepared, you're a walking Happy Meal.  So what do you do?  Well, assuming you're of the Boy Scout persuasion, you'll be prepared!  Let's list the five most important steps for surviving a "Zombie" type E.O.W. (end of world) scenario!


1. DON'T FUCKING PANIC!!!

     Not trying to state the obvious, or quote Hitchhiker's Guide here, but if you go running about like a crazy person, you're toast in an hour, tops.  Keep a cool head.  Minimize your visibility, turn off any lights that may be visible, don't go cranking up AC/DC on the Sanyo, and just try to stay under the radar.  Remember, if they don't know you're there, they won't eat you.  There is a good chance that the Internet, cell phones, land lines, etc. may still be working for a while. The power may not go out for days. It may go out in 30 seconds.  Be ready if it does, but don't pass up the opportunity to get ahold of your cousin Dave down the street who has a collection of WWII era machine guns. Now would be a good time to split a 6 pack with him.

     Use your time wisely.  Gather water.  Fill the bath tub, toilets, sinks, and any unused containers with as much clean water as they'll hold. Your average hot water heater will hold anywhere between 20 and 80 gallons of clean water which can save your sorry carcass from dehydration in a pinch.  Improvise some weapons.  True, wielding a chainsaw and a shotgun looks fucking cool, but if you don't have a pile of hardware kicking around, find something that will keep somebody from eating your spleen (hockey stick, machete, kitchen knives, ball bat, length of chain, etc.), and keep it handy!  Stay away from swords you buy at the mall and/or flea markets, they're garbage.  The only damage these flimsy pieces of Chinese stainless are going to deal is to yourself.  A good solid machete can be purchased at any hardware store for around 20 bucks, and is designed to take some pretty solid abuse.


2. HAVE A BUG OUT / BUG IN PLAN!

     Have a small amount of food, water, batteries, and other necessities stashed somewhere.  Enough to keep everyone in your household fed, hydrated, and sane for at least three days.  Think "hurricane prep", or if you're out west, "earthquake prep".  Remember Murphy's Rule of Doubles- two is one, one is none.  If you have ONE flashlight, it will fail.  If you have two flashlights, one of them will probably STILL fail.

     If you are one of the more intelligent folks in our great nation, you'll stock a good supply of ammo for whatever weapons you keep handy.  A big ol' Desert Eagle or $2,000 1911 isn't going to help you do shit unless it goes "BANG" . . . "CLICK" doesn't help, so keep enough bullets to load old Betsy up!  If you're actually facing zombies (be they undead, infected, or just stoned on bath salts) you may want to go with fortification rather than trying to get out of Dodge.  Plywood and a good battery powered drill can turn your average duplex into a poor man's Fort Knox inside of an hour.


3. DON'T BE STUPID!

     I know, I know.  Common sense is so rare these days, it should be considered a superpower.  But it really doesn't take an over abundance of brain cells to understand that if you F#$% up in this scenario, you're probably not going to live very long.  Whether it's an actual Zed Event, or just some good old fashioned civil unrest, hospitals probably aren't going to be very helpful.  Going back to Rule Two, a good supply of any necessary medications should be a part of your first aid kit... you do have a first aid kit, right?

     So, let's just sum this one up: no flaming 151 shots, no playing with lawn darts, don't go trying to change light bulbs while using your pogo stick, and for the love of Pete, don't go getting in a fist fight with other survivors.  It's counter productive, and you're just wasting bandages.


4. DON'T COUNT ON THE CAVALRY COMING TO THE RESCUE!

     Depending on where you live, what type of disaster you're facing, and how much karma feels like kicking you in the nuts, you may not be rescued.  Chances are, you might be fending for yourself on a pretty permanent basis.  Now, while there is safety in numbers, there is also stupidity, jealousy, cockiness, and overall jackassery in numbers.  Don't go shacking up with the creepy neighbor who likes to leave dead animals on your mailbox, but don't pass up the opportunity to add a solid member to your party either.  This really boils down to how well you can read/judge people.  A few solid compatriots can save your life,  One bad egg can end it with a quickness.  If you wouldn't trust someone to watch your place while you're away before the end of the world, you probably don't want them watching your back after it.  Large groups can be great, or terrible.  While a larger group does give you more safety in numbers, it can also put you in close proximity to some rather tedious crap,  i.e. other people's drama, stupidity, power struggles within the group, and let's not forget the fact that infection spreads much quicker in a denser population.  Use CARE!


5. DON'T GET DEPRESSED!

     Remember, you just survived the frackin' apocalypse!  You're a bad MoFo as long as you don't end up as Zombie Kibble for doing something stupid .  Don't let the fact that you're one of the only people you know who doesn't smell like roadkill get you down.  Just think, all of their neat stuff is free for the taking.  No more waiting in long lines for coffee every morning.  No more getting cut off in traffic on your way to work.  HELL, NO MORE WORK!!!  Well, no more job anyway.  Surviving is going to take a frigging pile of work, but at least you don't have to wear a tie!  Your attitude is going to determine how long you last. Being all mopey about how you're the only member of your fantasy football league who isn't chewing on one of their neighbors isn't going to help.  A positive outlook can save your life.  Be hopeful, optimistic, and stay active.


                                                     * FINAL NOTE:  NEVER GIVE UP!!!*

                  'Til next time, remember - there's no kill like overkill!  Keep the safety on, kids!




Pre'Ween 2013 logo




Posted by Brandon Early for ZombieBert

Sunday, October 13, 2013

A Random Assortment Of Hammer Myths, Monsters, And Maniacs (In Chronological Order, Of Course)

X The Unknown poster               MISCELLANEOUS HAMMER FILMS    


X The Unknown (1956)                                                                                            
Quatermass 2 – Enemy From Space (1957)  
                                  
The Abominable Snowman posterThe Abominable Snowman (1957)                                                   

The Hound Of The Baskervilles (1959) 
                                              
The Stranglers Of Bombay (1959)                                                       
The Two Faces Of Dr. Jekyll (1960) 
The Two Faces Of Dr. Jekyll poster                                                                                                
The Curse Of The Werewolf (1961) 

Scream Of Fear (1961)                                                  

The Curse Of The Werewolf poster Captain Clegg (1962)                                      
Scream Of Fear poster
These Are The Damned (1963)
                                  
The Gorgon (1964) 
  
She (1965)

One Million Years B.C. (1966)
   
Quatermass And The Pit (1967)  

The Devil Rides Out (1968)

When Dinosaurs Ruled The Earth (1970)

These Are The Damned posterDr. Jekyll And Sister Hyde (1971) 

Hands Of The Ripper (1971)                                                            

Fear In The Night (1972)




The Gorgon poster


She poster     Here at last is the third and for now final chronological listing of titles from Hammer Films.  This is another stack of movies destined for Pre'Ween viewing, and it's comprised of titles from Hammer that don't fit the Dracula, Frankenstein, or Mummy mold (funny, I said "Mummy mold").  As stoked as I am to catch up on the titles I've missed from the big three, I'm really chomping at the bit for some of these miscellaneous  titles.                                                                                      
     The Hound Of The Baskervilles (Cushing and Lee!), Scream Of Fear (with a brand new copy on disc courtesy of the Info Zombie!), These Are The Damned (singular sci-fi / horror with a great title!)  The Gorgon (also Cushing and Lee, also a brand new disc!),  One Million Years B.C. (Raquel Welch in a fur bikini!), Quatermass And The Pit (much lauded, most recent, and most colorful of the Hammer Quatermass pics!) . . . all of these will be first time viewings for me!
One Million Years B.C. poster 
     Also on tap:  re-watches of some known commodities that I've seen before . . . Cushing is always a win, but The Abominable Snowman is particularly good.  Watching Oliver Reed chew up the scenery again in Hammer's one and only werewolf movie will also be a treat.  The Devil Rides Out aka The Devil's Bride is always kitschy fun.  My "gold star" re-watch, though:  Dr. Jekyll And Sister Hyde!  Don't judge me . . .

     Happy Pre'Ween watching, everyone!

Quatermass And The Pit poster     
           
                                
The Devil's Bride poster
Dr. Jekyll And Sister Hyde poster
Hands Of The Ripper poster


                                                
              
                                                                                    

 



                                                      
                          

Movies At Dog Farm Pre'Ween 2013 logo




Posted by Brandon Early
                                            

Sunday, October 6, 2013

Building The Perfect Beast - The Pre'Ween Halloween Monster Mix

The monster from Hell
A somewhat less than perfect beast . . . from hell!
     Everyone has a playlist for Halloween, right?  Well this is the track list for mine.  I cribbed ideas from similar playlists posted on other sites when compiling this, so now I'm just continuing the cycle.

     Tracks labeled "Radio Ad" are short promos that once were pressed on vinyl 45s and distributed to local radio stations.  Tracks labeled "Dialog" are, of course, snippets of dialog from the listed movie.  The entire program runs about seven hours.

     

                                  The Pre'Ween Halloween Monster Mix 2013

 
Phantasm poster    1) Phantasm / Fred Myrow 
    2) Bloodletting / Concrete Blonde
    3) Nature Trail To Hell / Weird Al Yankovic
    4) The House Of Exorcism / Radio Ad
    5) Evil Ways / Santana
    6) Killer Klowns From Outer Space / The Dickies
    7) Frogs / Radio Ad
    8) The Legend Of Wooley Swamp / Charlie Daniels Band
    9) Red Right Hand / Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds
  10) Friday The 13th Part 3 / Henry Manfredini
  11) Dogs And Cats (Ghostbusters) / Dialog
Frogs poster  12) Ghostbusters / Ray Parker Jr.
  13) The Professor (Evil Dead 2) / Dialog
  14) Something Weird / Zombina And The Skeltones
  15) The Twilight Zone / Bernard Herrmann
  16) Werewolves On Wheels / Radio Ad
  17) Werewolves Of London / Warren Zevon
  18) The Zed Word (Shaun Of The Dead) / Dialog
  19) Zombie / Fabio Frizzi
  20) House Of 1000 Corpses / Rob Zombie
  21) Goo Goo Muck / The Cramps
  22) Psychos (From Dusk Til Dawn) / Dialog
The Gates Of Hell poster  23) Psychotic Reaction / Count Five
  24) The Gates Of Hell / Radio Ad
  25) Surfin' Dead / The Cramps
  26) Clap For The Wolfman / The Guess Who
  27) Werewolf Bar Mitzvah / Tracy Morgan
  28) The Addams Family / Vic Mizzy
  29) Welcome To My Nightmare / Alice Cooper
  30) A Nightmare On Elm Street / Charles Bernstein
  31) Empire Of The Ants / Radio Ad
  32) Spiders And Snakes / Jim Stafford
  33) Help Me (The Fly) / Dialog
Empire Of The Ants poster  34) More Human Than Human / White Zombie
  35) Valley / Bill Wyman And Terry Taylor
  36) Down With The Sickness / Richard Cheese
  37) Five Tones (Close Encounters . . . ) / Dialog
  38) Unmarked Helicopters / Soul Coughing
  39) Sugar (Army Of Darkness) / Dialog
  40) Love Potion #9 / Clovers
  41) In The Flesh / Blondie
  42) Buried In NY (An American Werewolf . . . ) / Dialog
  43) Blue Moon / Meco
Suspiria poster  44) Fire / The Crazy World Of Arthur Brown
  45) Green Slime / Charles Fox
  46) Phantasm / Radio Ad
  47) Burn The Flames / Roky Erickson
  48) Tocatta And Fugue In D Minor / Bach
  49) The Munsters / Jack Marshall
  50) Dragula / Rob Zombie
  51) House On Haunted Hill / Radio Ad
  52) Thriller / Michael Jackson
  53) Somebody's Watching Me / Rockwell
  54) Eyeball and Suspiria / Radio Ad
  55) Suspiria / Goblin
The Blob poster  56) The Ballad Of Harry Warden / Paul Zaza
  57) My Body's A Zombie For You / Dead Man's Bones
  58) Blood Horrors / Radio Ad
  59) Profondo Rosso - Main Title / Goblin
  60) Witch Queen Of New Orleans / Redbone
  61) Black Magic Woman / Santana
  62) Tales From The Crypt / Danny Elfman
  63) Get Away (Aliens) / Dialog
  64) The Witch / The Cult
  65) Bad Moon Rising / Creedence Clearwater Revival
  66) It Knows (Poltergeist) / Dialog
Young Frankenstein poster  67) Fear Of Ghosts / The Cure
  68) Insect Politics (The Fly) / Dialog
  69) Human Fly / The Cramps
  70) Deranged / Radio Ad
  71) Murder In The Red Barn / Tom Waits
  72) The Devil Went Down To Georgia /Charlie Daniels Band
  73) The Zoo (An American Werewolf . . . ) / Dialog
  74) Little Red Riding Hood / Sam The Sham & The Pharaohs
  75) Not A Boat Accident (Jaws) / Dialog
  76) Love Bites / Judas Priest
  77) Tenebre - Main Title / Goblin
Alone In The Dark poster  78) Grizzly / Radio Ad
  79) Pet Sematary / The Ramones
  80) I Have No Home (Ed Wood) / Dialog
  81) Bela Lugosi's Dead / Bauhaus
  82) It's Alive / Radio Ad
  83) Monster / L7
  84) What Hump? (Young Frankenstein) / Dialog
  85) Superdeformed / Matthew Sweet
  86) Munchies (Zombieland) / Dialog
  87) I Was A Teenage Zombie / The Fleshtones
  88) Ed Wood / Howard Shore
  89) Dead Man's Party / Oingo Boingo
  90) The Blob and Dinosaurus! / Radio Ad
  91) The Blob / The Five Blobs
  92) Alfred Hitchcock Presents / Cathodic Orchestra
  93) Ideal Patient (Halloween II) / Dialog
  94) Halloween / John Carpenter
  95) I'm Your Boogieman / Rob Zombie
  96) Dracula (Abbot And Costello . . . ) / Dialog
  97) Bad Things / Jace Everett
  98) The Ritz (Young Frankenstein) / Dialog
  99) The Monster Mash / Bobby "Boris" Pickett
100) The Lunatics Have Taken Over . . .  / The Fun Boy Three
101) Sweet Dreams / Marilyn Manson
102) Country Death Song / Violent Femmes
103) Invasion Of The Blood Farmers / Radio Ad
104) Living Dead Girl / Rob Zombie
105) Hey Man Nice Shot / Filter
106) Friday The 13th / Henry Manfredini
107) He's Back (The Man Behind The Mask) / Alice Cooper
108) Freddy's Coming For You / Charles Bernstein
109) Mr. Sandman / The Chordettes
110) Motel Hell / Radio Ad
111) People Are Strange / Echo & The Bunnymen
112) I Cast You Out (The Exorcist) / Dialog
113) Tubular Bells / Mike Oldfield
114) Coming To Get You (NOTLD) / Dialog
115) Return Of The Living Dead / Ghoultown
116) Trioxin Theme / Frances Haines
117) Cannibal Girls and Raw Meat / Radio Ad
118) I Ain't Nothin' But A Gorehound / The Cramps
119) Haunted House Of Rock / Whodini
120) Black No. 1 / Type O Negative
121) Ave Satani / Jerry Goldsmith
122) Sympathy For The Devil / The Rolling Stones
123) Attack Of The Killer Tomatoes / Radio Ad
124) It's Only The End Of The World / Harley Poe
125) Psychedelic Werewolf Freakout / Radio Ad
Deliverance poster126) Slime Creatures From Outer Space / Weird Al Yankovic
127) I Wanna Be Sedated / The Ramones
128) Backwoods Massacre / Radio Ad
129) Dueling Banjos / Eric Weissberg
130) Dark Night / The Blasters
131) Mean Green Mother From Outer Space / Levi Stubbs
132) Silver Shamrock / Alan Howarth
133) Spooky / Classics IV
134) L'alba Dei Morti Viventi / Goblin
135) I Walked With A Zombie / Roky Erickson
136) Haunted House / Gene Simmons
137) I Was A Teenage Werewolf / The Cramps
138) Them! / Radio Ad
139) No One Lives Forever / Oingo Boingo
140) Rube (Silence Of The Lambs) / Dialog
141) Psycho Killer / Talking Heads
Halloween poster142) Chop Up Your Mother / Sic F*cks
143) Fancypants (Army Of Darkness) / Dialog
144) Ghost Town / The Specials
145) Everyday Is Halloween / Ministry
  



          





   Posted by Brandon Early

Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Ghoulish Gary Gatorbait And The Horrible Truth About Pre'Ween

Pre'Ween October 2013 logo by beingretro.com
Pre'Ween logo provided by beingretro.com
     Pre'Ween is a sham.

     Pre'Ween is a term I coined to describe the thirty day period preceding Halloween.  Only this and nothing more.  I programmed  a weekend long horror movie festival for the proprietor of the real Dog Farm last October, and I referred to it in the schedules as The Movies At Dog Farm Pre'Ween Picture Show.  The event took place on the weekend prior to Halloween.  It was clearly in the spirit of the approaching holiday, but it didn't actually occur on the holiday.  Pre'Ween was born.  Pre'Ween is just a made up word.

     . . . except it isn't . . .

     Just for shits and giggles I vowed to promote the notion of Pre'Ween.  I decided it would be fun to see if I could get the term accepted into the local vernacular.  Since I now have another platform in the form of this blog with which to propagate the notion of Pre'Ween, I decided I would do so this October.  I researched a bit just out of morbid curiosity to see if I could find evidence of  the term being used anywhere else . . . and dammit, I did.  Pre'Ween wasn't my creation after all.

Screamin' Jay Hawkins
Screamin' Jay Hawkins, not Gatorbait
     It turns out the term Pre'Ween was first used way back in the sixties - 1965, to be exact.  It was used by a local horror movie host in Gainesville, Florida who hosted under the moniker Ghoulish Gary Gatorbait for the CBS affiliate WGFL-TV.  Like many local horror hosts, Gatorbait was actually a station employee Monday through Friday (an accountant named - I shit you not - Gary Numan), and he took on the role for WGFL's Friday night horror movie broadcast.  As was usually the case with these broadcasts, he hosted movies from the Shock Theater packages that were comprised primarily of old black and white Universal movies and sold to television stations nationwide.  The character of Gatorbait was fashioned to resemble a swamp dwelling witch doctor - think Screamin' Jay Hawkins, except white and minus the nose bone.  Ghoulish Gary Gatorbait is largely forgotten now, and he's almost never mentioned in books or documentaries about the horror host phenomena.  You see, Gatorbait was abruptly pulled off the air in November of 1966, and it was Pre'Ween that was responsible for the character's demise.

WGFL logo     October of 1966 was actually the second year that Gatorbait used the term Pre'Ween on air, but it was the first that the term turned up in print ads for the his show published in the Gainesville Sun newspaper.  WGFL used the term in newspaper ads throughout the month as a marketing hook to lend a little extra pizazz to the ads and to milk Halloween for an entire month rather than just a single day.  It's clear, though, that Gatorbait used the term on air in October of 1965, prior to its use in the station's marketing.

It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown
The arrival of the Great Pumpkin, the end of Gatorbait
     All was well until the station attempted a cross promotion and requested that Gatorbait promote the upcoming premiere of a Halloween special called It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown on his own show.  Presumably, the powers that be felt that the Monster Kids who were staying up late on Fridays to watch Frankenstein and Dracula would likely be interested in a Halloween themed animated special, as well.  The special was set to air on Tuesday, October 27, and Gatorbait promoted its debut throughout the month.  It was during his final broadcast before the premiere that he raised the ire of a local church affiliation by likening Pre'Ween to the church's observance of Advent.  Without realizing it beforehand, he had inadvertently equated the month of preparation before the celebration of the birth of Christ to the month of preparation before the celebration of  the arrival of a cartoon pumpkin.

     Public outcry was swift and merciless, and even though he apologized on air the following week, the damage had already been done.  WGFL was anxious to quickly put the bad publicity to rest, and Gatorbait's show was replaced with reruns of The Honeymooners.  Ghoulish Gary Gatorbait vanished into obscurity, as did the notion of Pre'Ween.

     That, friends, is the horrible truth about Pre'Ween.  That's the whole story.

     . . . except it isn't . . .

     Carl at The Info Zombie has discovered that the history of Pre'Ween can be traced back even further than this sad chapter.  Click the link for the rest of the story.

     Also, Warden Stokely Horrorzine offers up this Pre'Ween Dispatch From Hell . . .



Pre'Ween 2013 logo





Posted by Brandon Early