Yeah, I know, it's probably a bit early to be worrying about whether or not the baby is being irreparably damaged by exposure to televised horror programs. For one thing, he's unable to hold his head up long enough to watch anything. The only time he displays any neck strength at all is when I'm trying to burp him, and then he seems determined to throw a red-faced skunk eye on me throughout. He can hold his head up just fine for that. Still, I know he's cognizant of what's going on around him. It makes me wonder if immediate and prolonged exposure to this kind of entertainment explains what happened to me . . .
|Thom Yorke of Radiohead - Hey, man, are you OK?|
he heard a lot of Radiohead while still in utero. If Thom Yorke's solo album calms the baby, I'm more than happy to store that in the arsenal alongside his swaddling cloth and his Bippy. Whatever works, right? Then I'm watching the first episode of Bates Motel - while holding the baby, of course - while onscreen the young Master Bates attends a high school party (wait - what?), and waddayaknow, the music playing in the background is a Radiohead song. . . . so a young Norman Bates + exposure to Radiohead = Psycho. And I'm playing the kid Radiohead to soothe him. Nature versus nurture. I may as well start collecting small animals for Gunnar to kill.
Of course, Norman's problems are the result of a far more complex set of circumstances than just the music he hears. I watched the second episode of Bates Motel last night, and I nearly crawled out of my skin with "eeeew!" when Norman's mother very nonchalantly stripped clothing in front of her teenage son. Sure, in this case we know this is heading to a bad place, but . . . Only an hour or so before I'd been holding the baby because he'd been particularly fussy. I'd finally succeeded in getting him to momentarily settle down and rest, his next feeding was in the warmer, and I didn't want to rouse him unnecessarily before his bottle was ready. Here's the rub: I really, really needed to pee. If I laid him down he would immediately open his eyes and fuss. Well, I can hold the baby with one hand, and I can pee with one hand, sooooo . . . Don't judge me - I wasn't wearing a diaper.
|Norma Bates doing some household cleaning|
I just want the little guy to grow up healthy and happy. I want the same for young Norman. Maybe there's hope for him, too. The show's producers have already made clear that they won't necessarily be beholden to canon based upon Anthony Perkins' portrayal of the character. Is it possible that we live in a world where the young Norman Bates might somehow escape his dour fate, upbringing be damned? I actually think that would be weirdly inspiring. If there's hope for the most psychopathic fictional mama's boy that ever misused the cutlery, then maybe there's a chance I won't do too much damage to the wee baby Gunnar.
|We can fix this, right?|
Posted by Brandon Early